apparently I'm scary

But I am also very very busy.

I was wandering around the interwebs when I popped by to see one of my very favorite gals, the lovely and not scary but very talented Jo Beaufoix and saw that in honor of Halloween she had taken a little quiz...

I am not prone to the copy pasty quiz stuff ordinarily, however it IS Halloween and that IS one of my busiest days of the year what with my need to dress all lovely, carve up pumpkin flesh, make things glowy and lure small children to my home for a tasty treat...

And I thought "Well Jo wants to know if I am scary, maybe they do to"

So Here it is... Am I, Cami Kaos, scary?

You Are Scary

You even scare scary people sometimes!

How Scary Are You?

Um, so with all those cute little skulls they are saying yes? But look at their sweet little eye sockets and that darling set up upper teeth... how could they frighten anyone?

Obviously the test is skewed.

Happy Halloween all, I have merriment to make, spooky sounds to play, goodies to hand out and blood to curdle.

xoxo

Scary CamiKaos

unsolved mysteries

As we got ready to go to the neighborhood's annual Halloween Parade on Sunday there was a hurry, a flurry, a lot of motion and this and that as we dug through the costume box (a box large enough for the body of an adult human if need be) worked on makeup, found bits and pieces to customize ourselves with.

We were getting down to the wire with only 45 minutes before we needed to walk out the door and no one in costume yet when Mr. Kaos asked me to fit his fangs for him.

Having fit my fangs earlier in the week to ensure a smooth departure on parade day I was familiar with the process of pre-fitting, mixing and applying adhesives and then laying down for 10 minutes as the smell from the cement gets you high as a kite, so I thought it was natural that Mr. Kaos would ask for my assistance in his time of dental need. I instructed him to get my small mirror so he would be able to have a look and then I had him lay back so I could take advantage of... wait no... no.. that's another story... so I could fit his fangs. I asked him to open wide and I gently pushed back his soft pillowy lips to locate his canine teeth...

his canine teeth.

I SAID HIS CANINE TEETH....

I was flummoxed, confused, in awe of what I found. You would think after 6 years of marriage (happy anniversary babe) I would have known that my husband had no natural fangs. Those sweet little pointed teeth that show up in so many others were just... well they were gone and all at once my mind traveled back to a story he had once told me, a dream from his youth he had confided in me:

There had been a problem at school you see, he didn't remember doing it, he can't recall how it happened, all he remembers is the blood, scarlet on his shirt, and the warm coppery taste, how it filled his mouth and satisfied a hunger he never knew he had.

Normal enough right?

It would have slipped by without another thought as the morbid mental wanderings of a 10 year old boy except that's when they took him. He was taken away at the tender age of 10, put under sedation and wheeled into surgery... and they took them, his fangs, his canines, his teeth. There was a clever story they told the neighbors, that he had a few extra teeth and no room for them, they would grow in funny, they told them, if something wasn't done about it.

And he believed it at the time. He thought they were only doing what was best. His orthodontist told him it would be much easier to make him look... normal.

And he thought they were only talking about his teeth but we suspect there was something more to this. We feel that we've stumbled upon a bigger piece of the puzzle and that if left as he were Mr. Kaos would never have been Mr. Kaos at all, instead he would have been Count Moreland...

von't you be our neighbor

mini vlog

fang me

Earlier I wrote an entire post about the fact that I was trying to fit my vampire fangs and was stuck laying on my back for 10 minutes while the adhesive cured into whatever the hell it is that molds the fangs to my teeth.

An entire post about that. It wasn't a gem trust me.

But I wrote it and knowing how busy I am right now and how much is on my plate I almost went ahead and posted it.

Really really close. I am still thinking about it even as I type this replacement piece because, let's be honest, this one isn't going so well either....

But I'm going somewhere, I am.

Where was I?

Halloween that's where. Halloween costumes to be specific. With the big day almost upon us and 6,000,666 events that require costumes between now and Wednesday we're spending a lot of time making sure that all the little details (such as my fangs) are in place.

In case you hadn't guessed I'm going to be a vampire (again) (though not really again since it's been 4 or 5 years... that's a reasonable amount of time right???) (it is RIGHT?). K is dressing as a Vamp too (it's her first time, I'm so proud) even Mr. Kaos is going to be a vampire (much to his dismay, he wanted to be batman again).

We're going with a little theme while K is still young enough to not fully grasp that her mother's deep need to dress up and wander the neighborhood, march in a parade and go out to dinner in costume isn't "cool".

I'm taking advantage of that as long as I possibly can.

So while I'm scaring children with my big fangs, blood red lips and prominent cannons what will YOU be doing, and will you be doing it in a costume?

about the kaos family

With Halloween well on its way I thought it might be time to let you guys in on a little video Mr. Kaos recorded in 1989.



No, I'm not joking.



Yes it really is him.



(no, no it's him... the one singing... er... rapping?)




Just watch it... I'll wait.






Admit it, your life is more complete now.

spooks

Now begins the long thought out and very very exciting question of What to be for Halloween.

While I am sure many of you are thinking to yourselves "Hmmm, what will that little darling K Kaos be for Halloween?" you can keep that to yourself.

We are talking about something much more monumental than that. We are talking about what I am going to be for Halloween. That my friends is important.

In fact in my 30 years of Halloween I can only recall 1 Halloween that my most pressing thought for a month or two in advance was not about costumes and decorations and goodies. That was the year I got married. I got married 4 days before Halloween and before and after the wedding I was suffering from what you would call "morning" sickness. I would not call it morning sickness, I would call it "Oh my god I think I am going to die from puking, is that an internal organ, should we put that back" sickness. My most pressing thought in the months preceding that Halloween were "Please let me stop puking" "Gee I hope I fit into my wedding gown when I am 4 months pregnant" and "Who the hell looses weight when they are pregnant and can't fit into their wedding gown because it is suddenly too big" interspersed with more "please oh please let me stop puking". That is in no way relevant to this year though.

This year if there is to be any puking it will be my family puking from the amount of time and thought I give Halloween. I. Love. Halloween.

LOVE LOVE LOVE. Some people get all cheery and joyous at Christmas. Some people love and value Thanksgiving. Some Easter or Valentines day. I love Halloween.

Why? Why not? Halloween is AWESOME....

This year though, this year is special. This year is the first time that K is old enough to appreciate a little bit of horror. Just a little bit. Not much, not guts and gore (which is okay by me, my love of Halloween is certainly not hindered by a lack of gore). But mummies are super cool. Zombies are A OKAY. Werewolves are pretty neat. And Vampires. Apparently Vampires are the way to go.

The scariest thing I have been since K was born is a witch... which I have been 3 times in the last 6 Halloweens. I can do that with my eyes closed. She's been a witch twice because she thinks they're cute. This year though we aren't looking at angels or fairies or cats. No pumpkins or fuzzy little forest animals here. Not a super hero in site (Sorry Mr. Kaos, I know you had high hopes for dusting off your bat cape and cowl).

This year I get to be a vampire. Teeth and all... Because my daughter will not run screaming from the room when she sees the blood lust in my eyes... This year she is old enough to know that it really isn't blood lust at all, it's just mommy enjoying her FAVORITE holiday and having a really freaking great time.