Friday, May 09, 2008

cami's nature: a new theory

I didn't want to taint the loveliness that was yesterday's post with more talk of animals throwing themselves at me so I neglected to get into the beginning of my Wednesday. The part before I ran about all over town with MissB and the mystery person who shall not be revealed.

The tedious part.

The waking up at 6:15 to shower part.

The getting K and Mr. Kaos ready for school and work (respectively) part.

The rushing out the door and walking K to school only to find something blocking our way part.

Blocking our way? What? No... that's not part of the everyday happenings on our way to school. Whatever could it be?


That's right. It's an opossum. K and her two friends gathered around it blocking the sidewalk so we couldn't get through. I swear I saw it's little eye close and then open again. They oohed and aahed. I told them not to touch it. The other mother? She told them not to touch it... but they were drawn in.

Kids: Is it dead?

Me: I don't know. It's possible it's playing dead. That's their defense mechanism.

Kids: NO!WAY!

Me: Yep.

Kids: IT'S SO COOL!

Me: It's a rodent. Do not touch it. Come on, we need to get to school.

Kids: BUT... LOOK AT IT.

Me: What if I take a picture? Then will you move along

Kids: YES YEAH YEAH TAKE A PICTURE!!!! PLEASE!

Me: Fine. step away from it.

and then... I took that picture. Wanna see it again? No?

No.

Yeah, I get it. Doesn't do anything for me either.

But there it was. The opossum that I was pretty sure was playing possum. I snapped the shot, I showed the kids and off to school we went.

They were still asking if it was dead and my only response was that we wouldn't know until we went back later. Another mom pointed out that if it was still there after we dropped off the kids we could be pretty certain it was dead dead and not just playing at it.

Kids? Dropped off. Me? In a huge hurry to get home and finish getting ready to go so I can meet MissB at 9:30, but still I walked back past the creature only to see one of the other mom's bent over the huge rodent with a piece of paper in one hand and a paper sack in the other...

She was going for it. It was dead. Her youngest daughter wanted to put it to rest so they'd decided to bury it in their back yard.

Yuck.

I stepped back about 3 paces and watched as she crinkled up her nose and wrapped the paper around the possums tail lifting it into the paper grocery sack. Against my own better judgment I began to imagine the weight of it and how much it would have pulled against her fingers as she held it by the tail.

Again. Yuck.

She folded the bag shut and tucked it into a bottom basket of her stroller.

Oh. My. Yuck.

We walked together until it came time for her to turn towards her house and then I sped up my strides to get to the house as quickly as I could.

I washed my hands 5 times when I got home... and I never even touched the thing.

All this happened within couple of houses of my raccoon occurrence last Friday. It was a block from the great snake attack *cough cough* of May 08.

Nature, Cami and that block have something going on...

That's when it occurred to me... not too long ago an acquaintance's daughter said I looked like Snow White. I won't lie. I was flattered. Thrilled. Tickled.

OK, totally stoked. With her smooth black hair, milky white skin and red red lips... oh if goth girls heart a princess Snow White is the one we heart (I'm so right aren't I Flutter?).

What if this little princess hearting girl was on to something... what if she's right.

What if.... What if I am Snow white? It would explain all the animals... I really hope 7 short miners don't start following me around expecting me to clean up after them... cause that's just not my gig...

No really it's not. Just ask Mr. Kaos or the dust bunnies under our bed...

20 comments:

Korie said...

I would SO totally be avoiding that block if I were you. It sounds all Pet Sematary-ish to me.

Belle is my favorite princess.

Bubblewench said...

Um, yeah. Nature is definatly trying to tell you something.. not sure what though.

Bellevelma said...

Pet Sematary! ROFL!

Evil Witch said...

You SO look like Snow White.

Anonymous said...

Ewwww

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

I'm wincing, laughing, and I think I threw up a little in the back of my mouth. Brilliant post!

Jo Beaufoix said...

Oh my bob, you do look a little like Snowwhite. Do not accept any fruit from wizened old crones ok?

And she put that, heave, under her pushchair? Heave.
Eughhhhhwwww

Lindy said...

7 short miner doing my bidding- I think I could deal with that.

mielikki said...

I would have rather seen a picture of the dust bunnies than a dead opossum.
*eew, shudder*

sybil law said...

I HATE POSSUMS.
I ALSO HATE DWARVES.
What are you doing to me?!
Also, I believe the animals loooved Snow White. They did not want to maim her. Or maybe you just read their signals all wrong? Or, more likely, you're more like Snow White In Shrek the 3rd!
And she kicked some ASS.
:)

CamiKaos said...

Syb: Yes... yes she did.

Mie: I know. NASTY. Go look again.

Lindy: Once having a group of guys that followed me around wanting to do my bidding I can tell you it gets old the first time you want 10 seconds of privacy.

Jo: I will... as a matter of fact maybe I will just avoid shiny red apples on principle.

Kimberly: thank you. Not missing the Portland city wildlife are you? ;)

Lori: eeew indeed

Denise: THANK YOU. Are you kissing up because you are trying to get out of what I said you had to do on the podcast or did you NOT hear last week's show so you aren't aware that I called you out?

BV: Apparently our friend's cat kills a lot of small animals.

BW: I think it's trying to tell me to be a shut in

Lilac: Can't avoid it. It's where one of my daughter's best friends lives and it's on our way to school...

Lia Hollander said...

So, I'm sitting here waiting for blogger comments to load. And I can see our photo from yesterday, and I think to myself, "hey, my eyebrows look good in that picture, score!"

Oh, did you think my comment was going to be about you? Must everything be about you?

Oh, I didn't realize that. I will try harder.

CamiKaos said...

missb: It's only fair since my comment on your post was about me... but you're right. Your brows look fab in that pic.

holly said...

sorry. very sorry. but i am TOTALLY picturing you dancing elegantly about the kitchen at your workplace, birds fluttering around, and you putting poison in your boss' coffee. niiiice.

Anonymous said...

That one is in pretty good shape. We always find the ones that are obviously been hit by a car...

My kids still want to look.

-Stu

Anonymous said...

Marsupial sweetie. NOT Rodent. They aren't technically native to North America. Some frigtard introduced them to the continent ages ago- and they thrived, living the rodent lifestyle. This one's lifestyle probably caught up with it.

flutter said...

You totally DO. You are so very right.

Now, sing me the wishing well song and summon me some woodland creatures ;p

Travis Erwin said...

I loath possums. To me they are just giant rats.

stephanie said...

The Urban Snow White. Awesome! Maybe you could have sung that baby back to life...

Unknown said...

Aw, sad. I was totally in suspense as to the possum's life or death status. I was hanging on there until the end of the post. Ah well. RIP.