a little overreaction never hurt anyone

I admit it...

I'm a worrier... when it comes to my people if things aren't going smoothly I tend to get a little concerned.

That's an understatement.

A really big understatement.

I don't fly off the handle and force them into the hospital for a cold but I will stay by their side as much as humanly possible (x10) until they're all better...

But what's this? A dilemma!

I was scheduled to help in K's class Thursday morning. I do it at least once a month and have since she started school. It's something I really look forward to, but not nearly as much as she does. There's something about the day that I help in class that's just perfect for her. Magical. She loves it...

Knowing that I would have a full morning ahead of me and that I would not only have to get her and Mr. Kaos ready and out the door but get myself showered, fed and ready too, I went to bed early Wednesday night.

Really early for me. Say... 10pm?

Mr. Kaos was complaining of being very tired and he was having a little indigestion so he too went to bed early (by 11? which again... very early for him). We were too tired for any fun and games... too tired to do anything at all except fall into a deep sleep...

Well I fell into a deep sleep.... He laid in bed with his stomach pain slowly increasing until I awoke at 1 AM to hear him complaining about it.

By 1:30 he was getting sick in the bathroom.

Mr. Kaos doesn't do that. In all the time we've been together he as "gotten sick" 3 times. I felt so bad for him. I got up, fetched him water, offered him a cool cloth and stayed up fretting for about an hour while he slowly went back to sleep...

When 6:15 rolled around I wasn't what you'd call excited to hop out of bed and into the shower, but I rolled out of the covers anyway. I reminded Mr. Kaos that he would NOT be going to work today and to turn off his alarm already, stopped by K's room and told her to rise and shine, then hopped in the shower.

Mr. Kaos did not stir. He lay there quiet, still and hot.

Oh boy. He's sick. Really sick. Did he drink enough water? I hope he isn't dehydrated! Should I call the doctor?

Never mind that he's a 44 year old man who can take care of himself... I was worried.

But I pressed on with the morning getting K ready to go, feeling awful, wracked with guilt. I would feel guilty if I left him here alone in the midst of this illness, I would feel terrible if I canceled on helping in K's class (even if I found another mom to replace me).

Should I stay or should I go?

I figured that K's need may be greater today... she's been having a hard time as of late, we're not sure why...

I told Mr. Kaos to call if he needed me and I took her to school careful to keep my cell phone on and near me (I always turn it off when I'm helping in class... I want the kids to have my full attention).

At first things were fine. I was glad the phone didn't ring thinking it meant he was resting well. Getting better. Then the worry got the best of me.

What if he's sick again? What if he isn't drinking water? What if he doesn't eat anything? What if he's dehydrated? What if he's laying unconscious on the bathroom floor in a pool of his own sick and he drowns? What if he NEEDS ME?

I wish I was joking but I really thought about each of those items.

So while the kids took their spelling quiz I sent a text message... I'm really not a texter but this time I felt it was the best option. I could check on him and not disturb the class. Win win right?

Wrong. He didn't send a message back. There was no indication he got it.

He's just sleeping, I told myself. He needs the rest, I assured myself.

Still the thoughts came:

What if he's sick again? What if he isn't drinking water? What if he doesn't eat anything? What if he's dehydrated? What if he's laying unconscious on the bathroom floor in a pool of his own sick and he drowns? What if he NEEDS ME?

But I pushed them away and continued on... We worked on all manner of projects and then it was time to get the kids ready for lunch. They all dutifully washed, wandered off to their lockers, got lunches, coats and blankets to prepare themselves for lunch, recess and quiet time. I waited. K brought in her Hello Kitty lunch box and my Munsters lunch box and got in line.

"Can I carry your lunch box mama, it's just so cool!"

I told her of course she could. I walked down the hall with her lunch box in one hand and her hand in the other while she strutted with my Munsters lunch box held out for all the school to see...

I ate in silence. The children talked and laughed. I helped them open their packages. Told them to use nice hands. Thought about Mr. Kaos... hoped he had been eating something, drinking water, getting rest, feeling better.

As the kids were dismissed for recess I walked K and her two lovely friends out to the playground and then made a break for it. A beeline.

I hurried away from the school waiting until enough distance had passed and the din had quieted and I called Mr. Kaos.

The phone rang and rang.

No answer. Voicemail.

Oh the worry. Oh the concern. Oh the hysterics:

What if he's sick again? What if he isn't drinking water? What if he doesn't eat anything? What if he's dehydrated? What if he's laying unconscious on the bathroom floor in a pool of his own sick and he drowns? What if he NEEDS ME?

Of course I knew that he was just sleeping. He probably turned off the ringer wanting to rest and not get any calls from work (or his irrationally insane wife).

Still... did I enjoy my walk in the sunshine? Did I stroll? Did I stop to get a chai for myself?

Hell no. I bolted home as fast as I could walk, climbed the front step, unlocked the door and called out to him...

There was no answer.

I threw off my coat, kicked off my shoes and dropped my purse on the table...

I hurried into the bedroom to find him asleep in bed.

Feverish... but fine.

Now imagine how bad I am when K's sick...