Monday, July 16, 2007

she who spills things...

Or rather she who comes painfully close to spilling things.



What kind of things?



Beans mostly. Not just any beans. The magic beans. Beans of knowledge. Di$neybean$.



This evening Mr. Kaos' parents showed up to say hello and drop off a little gift for K, some spending money of her very own for when she is in "california" (that's what we're using as code for di$ney).



She was thrilled. And she was packing. Thrilled and packing. She had money. HAPPY MONEY. THANK YOU FOR THE MONEY!!!! And then she went back to packing.



But as she is 5 years old her idea of packing for "california" is different than mine. She couldn't care less about the clothes she needs to cover her nakedness. It is california... lets all be nude...



No. I don't think so.

But yes, she wants to pack the toys, her broken compass, the milk bottle for her wretched evil panda bear (that makes sucking noises and burping noises and this awful crying noise) and her stethoscope and her flower pillow wallet and her extra hair brush and her play blow dryer and curling iron and her sun catchers, ring game, card game, play baby powder, unicorn, baby doll, polly pockets, the list goes on and on really. So while I was saying thank you to his parents she was shoving more toys in the suitcase and I said....



oh boy, what I said...



K, you need to listen, see this money? It can buy a lot of toys in Disneyland, but only if you....



OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT OHMYHELLINAHANDBASKETWHATDIDISAY!!!



don't pack a lot of toys to take with us.



K looked at me funny, said huh?



To which I replied



When we go to California you will need room in the suitcase for new toys. If we bring all these toys we won't have room to bring any back. From California.



She said okay



And then I almost fainted from relief that she did not realize I told her we were taking her to that happy happy place where fairies pee gold and princesses wander around blowing kisses...



But when we tell her I have a feeling it will all click and she will realize all the little errors we have made that should have given us away...



And she will see us for the liars that we are and most probably choose that moment to ask if the Easter Bunny is real... and what about Santa for that matter.



Not only did I almost spill the beans, I may have opened up a can of worms to join them...



yup.

16 comments:

Bubblewench said...

O MY Freakin hysterical!

And I thought it was going to be Mr. K spillin....

Bellevelma said...

Good save! Let us know if she starts asking questions later today. Mom, I thought you said Disneyland...

CamiKaos said...

bellevelma: SHHHHHH! She could hear you! I am not taking anychances... we have only a few days left...

BW: He has said it in her general vicinity like 6,000,000 times, but never when addressing her.

Bubblewench said...

she is so in the know on the subconscious level....

Lori said...

How funny! You've done good so far. Just wait until a nice flgith attendant on the plane tries to make small talk with her and asks if she's going to Disneyland. The light bulb will go off! Good luck! Did you book a meal with the princesses? I bet she'd love it.

BTW I've nominated you. Check out my blog!

Jo Beaufoix said...

Ahh that is so funny.
I mean, it wasn't funny for you, but it was funny.
And hey, if Disneyland is real then Santa and the Easter Bunny must be too so don't worry.

Celtic Rose said...

Yikes! Good save though . . .
Good luck during the remaining days.
Hopefully she will be too excited about going to the (sh-h-h) 'happy place' that she won't question the reality of Santa and the bunny, hopefully!

flutter said...

Oh crapshit!! That was close

Unknown said...

Haha, you got lucky!
Made me think, though (happy? you're blog made me think).
I'm *really* good at keeping secrets. You tell me not to tell anybody, and I won't, not even hubby (thereby breaking the unspoken rule that telling hubby isn't really telling anybody, right?). But I can't keep things from T. Ok, I'm not trying to keep anything as momentous as DL from her. But I was trying not to let her know that her Grandma Monique is coming at the end of August. And yet, in casual conversation I told her "well, when Grandma Monique comes.." Shit. Now, for the next 5 WEEKS, it'll be "when's Grandma Monique coming?" "why isn't she here now?" "Is she coming tomorrow?" Exactly what I was trying to avoid.

mielikki said...

ooh, close one.
The fairie's pee gold? How did you come by that information, pray tell? Ease my curious mind!

Lindy said...

Whew! I just read about a weeks worth of posts. I've been out off line due to dodgy DSL connections. I'm a happy girl now that I've had my Mommified fix.

Let's hope K doesn't make the connection. She'll be too filled w/ excitement about DL. I looooved your post on HP and I agree about Snape. I also think that Harry killing him will be in keeping w/ JKR style. Poor Harry will suffer for it. I've pre-ordered my book and I'm resisting the urge to queue up for the midnight party at our local independent bookstore.

julie said...

I must be a fairy. :)

That's so funny. I bet you're right. She'll figure it out later and wonder how she didn't realize sooner. It's still so fun to have a surprise!

Unknown said...

Yikes! Dodging bullets like you're in The Matrix. Nice save.

sybil law said...

DOH!
Well, I'll let it pass. But really - she knows. :P

landismom said...

Great save! I have to say that my daughter just figured the Easter Bunny out, and she's almost 8. She's still convinced that Santa is real, though. So you may be in luck.

Anonymous said...

fairy golden showers bring may flowers?