Tuesday, May 01, 2007

is it noticeable?

Can you tell? You'd tell me if you could tell right?

Tell what? That I am oh. so. tired of remodeling my bathroom.

I am so over it and I am afraid it's going to find out. I really want to tell it the truth, that it's messy and disgusting and I am upset with it because it isn't there for ME in the middle of the night when I need to pee.

But then I haven't exactly been there for it either. I mean on Sunday I did buy it some pretty things, but it didn't even bother to put them on for me. So what did I do? Instead of helping it I sat down and had champagne and tiki drinks in the other room.

I closed the hall door so it wouldn't hear my laughter, but I think it knew.

Then yesterday when I should have been in there tearing down the last of the old dry wall that's keeping me from putting up it's shiny new surround I... well it's too horrible really... I did laundry and read blogs the entire day... I know, I should have been there.

It's just that even now when I look in my living room I see its junk all over the place. Tile, a toilet, sink, hardware, it can't even keep its stuff put away!

Should I go through with this even though I can't feel the love? Am I being unfair to my bathroom? I can't lie and say "it's not you, it's me" because there is obviously nothing wrong with me, I'm amazing (really I am). It would know I was lying.

I guess I just need to suck it up and be the bigger person. Maybe if I just throw myself into it and work really hard I can change my bathroom. Maybe I can make it be what I want. Maybe if I try hard enough it will be there for me... at 3 AM.


******************* 10:10 AM Edit*******************

People, it looks like Mr. Fabulous aka Dear Fabby will answer my letter tomorrow, I know whatever he says will ease my mind considerably so go check it out.


******************* 11:46 AM Edit*******************

I've been trying to pull together my 101 things about me (me me). It used to be over on the side bar but it seemed far too cluttered there so I gave it its own space... you can check it out on my side bar by clicking "my 101 things"...

5 comments:

mielikki said...

The bathroom feels abandoned. It misses you, too. Especially those late night, early morning visits that are just you, and it. It doesn't know how to tell you without coming off all needy, so it throws everything it can think of into your other spaces, to remind you that it is patiently waiting for your attention.

CamiKaos said...

it is so passive agressive throwing it's junk all over... why can't it just speak to me like it once did???

mielikki said...

because its in a schizophrenic kaos right now, and it is acting out accordingly. Maybe when its put back together, and beautiful, it will talk nice again. Either that, or its pissed off that you took away all the pink.

sybil law said...

You traitorous whore!
:)

Bubblewench said...

No Pink? What were you thinking! You spent all that time writing this awesome fun blog - why is there still tile in the living room?